Seek Happiness, Not Others’ Validation

Abstract

Our society has portrayed a “perfect picture” of what they believe a relationship should consist of. Female’s in different cultures feel like their options are limited, due to the backlash they obtain from others. My essay focuses on the different literary devices addressed in, Corazón, to demonstrate how machismo still plays a huge role. The book is written by a Salvadoran author, Yesika Salgado, who makes poems about her love stories and the impact it had on her identity. No one should feel the need to seek others validation because no matter how much you change for a person you will never be enough. 

Gisselle Perez

Gisselle Eileen Perez is an undergraduate student who is majoring in Biology. She looks forward to giving back to her community and volunteers at schools where she provides students with tutoring services. She plans to attend medical school to become a pediatrician and provide her patients with the best care. Her essay centers on the way society has pictured the ideal relationship and the barriers females encounter. 

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Throughout time our society has created an image of what they believe is the ideal relationship. One has been told by our family that in a relationship there should be trust, love,and that it’s essential to be able to communicate with one another. Culture has played a huge role in making women believe that they need a man in the household. Women believe that in order to have a good relationship a man plays a huge role, since men are seen as the strong ones in the relationship. In the book, Corazon, written by Yesika Salgado she centers her poems on her feelings being continuously hurt by men and how she has trouble trusting whether people like her for who she is or if they just use her as a distraction. Women tend to question their value, go into a state of depression, and have trouble opening up to others when they have gone through a toxic relationship. The author uses various literary devices in her poetry to help emphasize her feelings through imagery, rhetorical questions, and symbolism to further portray a bigger picture of what’s occurring. Even Though, the author is going through a harsh event, she still manages to use euphony in her poem which allows the audience to know her tone being upset or disappointed. 

Women feel the need to seek validation in order to be confident about themselves,however people shouldn’t value other people's opinion of what is best for themselves because in the long run only you can choose your destiny. In the book, Salgado’s poem, “ My Depression Has Questions,” she asks herself if she would have the audacity to tell a boy that she finds affection towards him. Salgado uses pathos, so that the audience is able to relate to what she’s feeling and to demonstrate the impact this situation had on her emotions. In the poem, Salgado says, “ and if he loves you, what is next? Will you warn him about all your crying?” This helps the audience visualize that using rhetorical questions was a way to show the thoughts that linger in her mind and she doesn’t seem to find answers too. (PG.17, line 1&2) We get the impression that the author doesn't want to be placed in an awkward situation with this male, so she has the desire to stay quiet instead and not scare this person away like the other boys who were once in her life. Not only that, but coming from a very strict household our parents often tell us that a man should be the one to open up his feelings to you. You are suggested to wait until this person is willing to share how he feels about you and if you don’t you are seen as desperate by the people you know. However, if you do wait you are left in doubt and sometimes, like this author, you are then hurt by that person. People around us have made it very hard for females to share their emotions because when you become brave enough to speak up people tend to criticize, however if you say nothing at all and end up getting hurt you will also be judged by others.

"People around us have made it very hard for females to share their emotions because when you become brave enough to speak up people tend to criticize, however if you say nothing at all and end up getting hurt you will also be judged by others"

Fear lives inside of you when you are exposed to a relationship that wasn’t good for your health. People sometimes don’t know how to express their feelings so they go into a state of depression, have mental breakdowns, and are continuously questioning their relationship. Within, “My Depression Has Questions,” Salgado states,“ the river behind your grandmother's house winding down your face, your throat, your lap,” this is symbolic to the tears that go down her face and the feeling she feels down her throat when the thought of him being with someone else comes to mind. (PG.17, line 7 & 8) This interpretation is overall significant because she uses it as a representation of how she's drowning in her emotions. She uses imagery in her poem when she looks back at the river behind her grandmother's house. The audience can assume that Salgado once drowned in the river and when you drown you feel like the water is pulling you down. So, this can relate to her relationship with the male figure because he makes her look back and reflect what she can do to open up to him. Salgado can also use these sentences to represent that she is drowning in her feelings and that she might have gotten the wrong impression of what was occurring in their friendship which makes her second guess herself. So, she questions if this boy is strong enough to let her know if he feels the same way about her or if he will begin to distance himself.

A relationship should be with someone that you feel comfortable with and where you build a strong connection like no other. If your partner isn’t willing to take the extra step for you, then you should ask yourself if this person is really worth the sacrifice because if a person really has a connection to you, he wouldn’t hurt you. Keep in mind that only you know what you're attracted to and what you seek from your significant other. Letting others validations get in the way will only invade your happiness because you won’t really be choosing who makes you happy, but what other people think is ideal. Seek for your truth and don’t let anyone get in the way of your happiness and success. If it’s what you want. then people should be able to be happy with you no matter who the other person is. Build a relationship where you will be able to overcome any barriers together and where you can live your life without any limitations.
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Works cited

Salgado, Yesika. Corazón. Not A Cult Press, 2017